This week I had a birthday. I saw this little girl . I found this little girl .

Do you remember what you were like as a child ?

I do . I loved doing cartwheels . I still do ! I enjoy the moment of silliness .

Funny , I forgot I liked to make up stories about a ZONY . Yep , a cross between a zebra & a pony . It’s a real thing . Google it ! Yep , I forgot I enjoyed writing .

The purest sense of who we are is as a child . Our gifts. Our talent . Our love . Never lose that innocence & wonder .

So this week, get out the shoebox or album and find a childhood photo .

What were you like? What did you like to do ?

My hope for you this week is that you rediscover the silliness that made you , YOU !

Would love for you to comment on what made you happy . May you hear the whisper .

“… And Jesus said ,” let the children come to me ..”

A Christmas alone.

A Birthday alone?

No way. Not this year.

I love Christmas. I hate Christmas. For all my single friends… You get it! The pure joy of the season makes me happy; but if I heard one more time at Christmas, “Are you dating anyone?” I would’ve had to shoot my own eye out…

I crave companionship like a Chicago deep dish pizza. So, over the Holidays, I stuffed myself with the oozing cheese… But then I came home, and the companionship craving crept in like the flu in July; unwanted and unexpected.

Oh, don’t get me wrong, I have a beautiful full life but every once in while the breeze blows and whispers, “How can you be happy if you are alone?”

So, I yell at God, “When are you bringing me a companion?”

I hear his quiet reply, “You again? I already brought you your dream, the beach, and you’re still begging for more?”

So, I throw smirk at the sky, “Fine. Here’s my deal? If I’m supposed to stay single for the next five years, I want a really big sign. I want a really big piece of sea glass… and not ANY sea glass. I want the rare find, aqua blue.

So, for the last few weeks, I combed the beach. I dug in the sand. I walked miles along the shoreline looking for the rare find. I filled a jar full of sea glass; but no blue.

I gave up. AND then … YEP! One afternoon, at the bottom of the stairs, when I was not looking, I practically stepped on my precious find; a big piece of aqua blue perfectly glistening in the sand.

I picked it up and threw a smirk at the sky. Yep, I know. I know. Quit digging. Quit searching. When the time is right, you will make it easy, and put the rare find, right in front of me.

I got my sea glass AND then…

An email. An invite. A birthday date. Birthday Alone?

No way. Not this year.

Is he “The rare aqua blue sea glass that I have been waiting for?”

Tuesday is right around the corner and time will tell.

Otherwise… I am happy. I am content. No more digging. I will wait for His Whisper .

“I will wait on the Lord…” Psalm 130:5

I consider myself a fierce competitor personally and professionally. I am an athlete that would rather hobble to the finish line than quit.

In my triathlon days, my performance was eighty percent training and twenty percent affected by outside factors; rain, heat, wind, and sometimes potholes.

I have learned that outside factors are out of my control and can affect work, projects, and even love. This past week I faced resistance in several areas of my life. It was like I was competing in a triathlon. I finished the swim course with ease but as I jumped on my bike I encountered a pot hole and then a flat tire. In one situation, I was accused of using my “flowery disposition and “spirituality” to my advantage.

Wow, naïve of me to assume that kindness and a willingness to serve would be a disadvantage and attempt to kick me back to the start line.

I jumped off my bike, threw it over to the side and decided to run to the next course – the next event. Even though I am solid solo competitor, this was not an individual race but more a relay race requiring team participation. Yes, a group project and unfortunately I had an unwilling team member. The finish line kept being moved. It was time to stop at the water station and take a break.

Maybe it was time to quit asking. Quit knocking. Maybe God was allowing the resistance. Maybe God was telling me that I was taking on too many projects.

I have always said, “If the road you are on is filled with potholes, it is God’s way of saying the path under construction. Do not remove the orange cones and road blocks. God will direct you to a smoother path. You just have to be prepared to take his detour.”

Maybe the answer was no because God was clearing the potholes and leading me to a easier course.

Psalm 27:4 “I will wait on the Lord.”

In work, are you frustrated? Without purpose? Are you in the right job? Best work environment? Or does something else garnish your talents?

In projects, are you facing resistance? Is something not going smoothly?

In love, is the relationship not connecting? Is it too much work? Are values not aligned?

We live in an imperfect world but God’s timing is perfect.

God has changed me over time. I no longer run instead I walk or hike. I can’t bike since I am used to flat Chicago streets, not a hilly California course. Throw me in the pool – there I will swim like a dolphin.

In work, projects, but especially love, find your joy. Allow the easy. Know when to stop for water, change the course, or stop the race all together. Not every finish line needs to be crossed.

What is God telling you? Wait on the Lord and he will whisper to you.

A journey . A week. A moment .

So a week ago I just returned from evacuating from the fires of Santa Barbara, not excited to be heading to the bitter cold of Chicago.

I said ,”Never again am I coming back to Chicago in the Winter .” The cold. The snow . The rush .

But a friend said,” Be expectant!”

A few spontaneous meetings and chance interactions later my icy heart was defrosted .

Here’s ten gems that friends and strangers shared with me:

1. The trip isn’t about you …it’s about what you can give to others.

2. Find joy in a moment . Don’t focus on the past or crap of tomorrow . Just the moment .

3. What you want in your 20s, is not what you want in your 30s. What you want in your 30s, is not what you want in your 40s . What you want in your 40s, is not what you want in your 50s .You need to be constant evolving .

4.Love the ones that God has given you .

5. You deserve BIG LOVE; wait for it !

6. The right guy, job, or house will be natural, easy .You will feel it .

7. Be around people who don’t steal your energy but multiply it.

8. Don’t measure a year by what you’ve done but instead by how you felt or how you served .

9. Open your HEART, then lose the letters H & T . You are left with EAR. Open your ears and you will hear God speak to your heart .

10. Whatever you wish for, believe it is coming .

What number speaks to you?

Open your heart . Open your ears. And let the whispers inspire you in 2018 . Be expectant…I am !

“ Wait on the Lord . Be courageous. He will open your heart .” Psalm 24:17

These faces . This yard . This is Christmas . I am going home . Home to Chicago.

This was left on my front porch , an olive branch . Peace was extended . Forgiveness was my reply .You will hurt . You will be offended . But can you forgive ?

When you go through trials, you realize simple is all you need .

Always important to find the little joys in the midst of your current fire .

#thomasfire

#santabarbara

I evacuated as a precaution yesterday from #thomasfires. I am home now . I do not worry . “ … for when your way is rough… your patience will grow. So let it grow, and don’t try to squirm out of your problems . For when your patience is finally in full bloom you will be ready for anything, strong in character, full and complete .” James 1:4 #santabarbara

Happy Thanksgiving from the Whisper Within!

From my family to yours .

It was a hot sunny day . Yep , I know, when is it not ? I live in Santa Barbara. It’s like Ground Hog Day on repeat .

The Beach . Sea glass . My Jeep .

A block from home; a tent . A lemonade stand . Posters . A cause ?

Yep , let’s do a ” U ” e!

I park , put a 5 in the jar, and read the poster.

LEMONADE FOR LYME- AID !

Are you kidding me ,God ?

“Excuse me, who has Lyme disease ?”

The petite woman answers, ” My whole family . Me,my husband, and my kids .”

My heart hurt . No, not you , too !

We exchange stories. The process of misdiagnosis . The ongoing pain . The unanswered path of healing. The cost of fighting the CDC , and the financial stress of paying for treatment .

Five minutes later , she handed me a postcard , Love for Lyme Warriors : Help save our future !

I flipped over the card .

A doctor’s name . A support group meeting . A Facebook group .

“If you are free ; come tomorrow to Handlebar’s coffee shop . It is our monthly meeting .”

A group . A neighbor . A fellow Lyme warrior.

I turned to the car but looked back and reread the poster . To me it read ” Welcome to Santa Barbara, you are home and not alone .”

Thanks, Ashley . You were my gift .

” AND we know in all things God works for the good of those who love him ” Romans 8:28

Every night I collect seaglass to remind me that through these little gifts , God is faithful .He whispers , “You will walk away from Lyme disease .”

A dresser and then a dream.

I can’t make up this stuff up…pull up a chair, get comfy, pour a drink, and enjoy the last sip.

It all started with a dresser. Yes, a dresser. I moved to Santa Barbara into a cute cottage or should I say, cracker box, about a month ago and had to let go most of my Chicago furniture.  One of bedrooms has no closets. Seriously, how do even call it a bedroom without a closet? I was in desperate need of storage. So with a press of an Facebook app and a search, I found a dresser. The arrangements were made.

Fifteen miles through the mountains, a forest preserve, deep into the woods, my GPS announced, “You have arrived at your destination.” Oh Crap!

I panicked and threw the jeep in reverse. It was straight out of a horror movie …” She went looking for a dresser and ended up dead.” That’s not gonna be me. I floored it, pulled over to a street light and tried to call the seller. No service. Are you kidding me?

I shifted to drive. Yep, I’m outta here…. Until lights. Sirens… and a “Miss, can I see your driver’s license?”

 “Sorry, officer. I am lost. Do you know where Paradise store is?”

Ten minutes later, I pulled in a parking lot.” Welcome to Paradise.” Seriously, God, Paradise? Furniture and cash were exchange. The deal was done. But the next day, I was pulled in by an antique chair. Same place. Same deal.

The talented furniture artist and I exchanged information. “Can you find me an armoire?”

A text received. Another deal was in the making. And then she gushed.

My husband said you are a writer.

I am a CFP, but I write a blog.

Later that day, another text:

I have read so many of your writings. I’m addicted. LOL

BUT Wait… Here is where the plot turns:

Her husband arrived at my house, money is exchanged, and then…

“ Lisa. I can’t thank you enough for believing in my wife and hiring her. She stepped down from her job from University of Santa Barbara to take care of our autistic child. I never finished college, but I can take the engineer test with California to be a licensed civil engineer. I am working towards it. No one believes in us. … We read your blog of how you were broke and now your living your dream…. You are giving us a chance to change our life.”

I bit my lip, swallowed hard, and hugged him.

“You are an amazing woman, Lisa.”

“No, God is amazing. Nicholle is so talented. You will be great.”

I closed the door and cried… and then yelled.

“You know me God, you really know me. You brought me here. I thought it was about me… but it was about You. I get it.”

Mother Theresa always said, “Serve the one in front of you.”

We are all called to serve. Sometimes, the smallest of ways, can have the greatest impact.

I  Corinthians 16:58 ” Nothing you do for the Lord will ever be wasted.”

You can change someone’s story. What is your heart whispering? Will you listen?

P.S. Please check out Minted & Chipped on FB for amazing furniture.

It is 3 a.m. I shift on the pillow.   What was that dream?

I lay contemplating. Lights on? Lights off? How far do you wanna take this?

With legs intertwined between sheets, I reach for the light. Oh… This is serious.

I grab my journal, my pen, and soon my thoughts can’t keep up with my scribbling hand.

Love…Why does love consume my daily rhythms and my nightly rems.

And why did I dream of him? And him too?

I beg for answers in the early dawn. God is not kind. He loves a mystery.

But love consumes me; it is the tempo to my day to which I measure… How much love was smashed, in the twenty-four hours?

Did I give love?

Did I get love?

That is the simple equation that must end with a positive integer.

I tally my week like standing in a grocery check-out line; mentally adding up the final cost.

• A “I love you, Lisa” from a ninety-one-year-old client.

• A package received across thousands of miles

• A hug given to blue eyes after surgery

• A tap on a knee from a white lab coat

• A nod to a stranger inviting him to join me on the pew

• A text for coffee served with a side of sweetness

My night awakens my craving … but my day is the real deal.

I give love.

I get love.

“If I gave everything… but did not love others, I would be of no value.” I Corinthians 13:3

Or as the Beatles sang, All you need is love.

I heard the whisper. You are good.

I drop my journal and the pen to the  floor.

Until my dreams get introduced to the light…. Lights off. Goodnight.

So do you give? Do you get?

Last Sunday was so hot I took my top off ; off my jeep, that is. I may live in California but  I still ooze with Midwestern blood.

As I  parked my car, a man wheeled up  and asked,”Hey,do you know where I can grab a cup of coffee?”

Throwing on my straw hat, I nodded and said, “Follow me.”

Attempting to wheel up an incline the man said, “Go ahead. I won’t be able to keep up.”

“No worries. I will push you.”

“Wow. So nice of you.”

“No big deal.  I get it. The father of my kids is a paraplegic. ”

I pushed him across the street and we made our way to coffee shop. Over an  ice coffee, he told me his story about becoming homeless and because of the kindness of The Santa Barbara  Mission he is getting back on his feet.

When we both saw the bottom of our coffee, I said, “Hey, I need to get going. I am looking at some homes today.  Maybe looking to move here.”

As we walked away, he said,”I am glad I met you Miss  Lisa. You should move here. You will make friends here since you are kind like the people of Santa Barbara.”

I leaned in to his sweat-soaked shirt and  with a hug said,”Thanks, Steve.”

I straightened my straw hat and turned to walk away when I heard, “Oh hey, Lisa. Thanks for the push.”

With a crooked smirk I said, “Steve,thanks for the push, too.”

Later that day, I met with my real estate agent, Jim Callahan, and his wife Kristin. We saw a house, near the beach but was not my ideal.  I am not sure which one said it  but I do remember one of them saying, “I know you want a house, blocks from the beach but there is a really cute cottage near The Mission. You should check it out.”

….And as if God was sending a sign, BOOM, out of nowhere a microburst storm  hit. Within five minutes, I was soaked looking like a wet rat.  Making my way through flooded and  tree-debris streets,  drenched or not, I felt a tugging or pushing of some sorts, to head to the next open house.

I walked in. A feeling washed over me like a tide pulling me home to shore.   The feeling was unexpected. The house checked no boxes on my spreadsheet but somehow it was everything I wanted. I was… happy.  So the control freak in me, needed to let go of the over-thinking and allow for the gentle tugging to reel me in; or like the homeless man from earlier in the day, wheel me in…

I admit, I am a stubborn German. I think I always know best but maybe it takes a push  or two to free myself and allow my heart to be… Happy.  Thanks to Steve, Jim, and Kristin for the extra push.

“Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you your heart’s desire.” Psalm 37:4

And as Paul Harvey always said, “And here’s the rest of the story…” Stay tuned in thirty days for the rest of the story.  Can you be brave enough to let go and allow yourself be happy and listen to what God is whispering or pushing you to do?

As I breathe in the grape sweetness of wine in the making, my eyes dance at the miles of the vines kissing the horizon.

Dents form on the sides of my mouth and give way to dimples. I cannot disguise my smirk, gushing like grapes in the wine vat.

I feel like Diane Lane in Under the Tuscan Sun when she says , “I got my wish .Everything I asked for …”

Fifteen years ago I could not afford a “happy meal” for my kids and now I am here. I got my wish.

Diane’s character runs parallel to my life. Divorced, loses it all,sad, wandering without direction, jumps to a foreign country( I think California qualifies as foreign ) but like all Rom-Com movies , the heroine’s train changes track .

Ms. Lane narrates at the end of the film , “They say they built the train tracks over the Alps between Vienna and Venice before there was a train. They built it anyway. They knew one day a train would come. Any arbitrary turn along the way and I would be elsewhere. I would be different.”
And so would I.

Diane’s soothing voice closes the film like dew on magenta grapes.
“Unthinkably good things can happen. Even late in the game. It is such a surprise.”
I tilt my sun hat to cover my blushing. The last few years have been a complete surprise. I never envisioned that my sour grapes would turn sweet .

“I don’t know where the path is leading but I know who is leading the path .” Proverbs 4:10

Embrace the twists of turns of life and dare to be surprised. I intend to.
Maybe like the movie, a Tuscan Villa has my name on it with an American gentleman who lives in Florence, ready to carry me over the threshold.
If that is God’s plan, I’ll be all in ; like a grape stomper-barefoot and all.

Climbing through the tattered rubble this morning, I lost my footing on the steps of the Acropolis. I sat on the marble steps and watched my college kids race to the top. I wipe my smirk and sweat from lips. I no longer see Ancient Greece in the distance but visions of Mickey & Minnie dance in the haze.

Even though the long day of Disney left my kids acting like Grumpy;they were not faking it – I was .

Unknown to them we were not on a magical kingdom ride since I was Cinderella about to lose my Prince Charming. Soon I would be like Snow White lost in the forest. We were tossed on the Mad Tea Party Ride, spinning like cups, ready to vomit, until the ride broke. This is where the beauty started.

Sixteen years later, as I watched my kids race to the top, I kicked the rubble at my feet, adjusted my sun hat and my focus.

Off in the distance, I saw the masterpiece of the ruins, The Pantheon and my kids. I climbed each step like an Olympian, torched raised high in victory .

We stood firm on the marble as the fellow tourist took our photo. That moment like the monument was HUGE!

We survived the merry-go-round of life.

No more faking smiles.

No more standing on shaking ground.

Sometimes you need to fall, breakdown, and kick some rubble to appreciate the beauty .

I may love the beach and the sand but ” In Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand.”

There is beauty in the breakdown.

Yesterday was a steaming hot Sunday at the farmer’s market. I laid my spinach, cilantro,  and zucchini on the table and a beautiful young girl took my produce and proceeded to weigh it.
The chocolate brown eyes looked up at me and sweetly said, “That will be 4.25.” I proceeded to hand her a twenty and without a calculator, she handed me three quarters and said, “75 makes five.” Then laid a five and ten in my hand, “ten and twenty.” As she took my zucchini off the scale, I caught my own reflection in the metal; not of the grown me, but the little girl I once was. I put my produce in my straw bag and smiled at the girl, “What is your name?”
“Arissa.”

“Arissa, you are a bright girl. How old are you?”

“Ten.”

“Arissa, when I was your age, I too, sold vegetables. My brothers and sister sold straight from our garden on a card table in front of my house. You are a hard worker. You have a bright future.”

As I started to walk away, I saw a vibrant woman standing nearby arranging produce under the tent.

I approached her and said, “Is that your daughter?’

“Yes.”
“My name is Lisa, What’s your name?”

” Alma.”
“Alma, you should be proud. Not only is Arissa here working on this hot day when other kids are playing inside but she is smart, good at math. She will do great in life,”

“Thank you.”

“I mean it. You see, I was just like your little girl. I, too, worked with my brothers and sister selling vegetables back in the day before organized farmers markets. I loved to count the money at the end of day and today I am a wealth manager. Your daughter can and become anything she wants,”

Alma smiled and then with her head held high said, “Thank you. She is good at math and I keep encouraging her to do well in school.”

“Alma, you are a good mom.”

My eyes glanced at the beautiful dimpled cheeks, “Arissa, keep working hard. God has big plans for you.”

They say the purest vision of our self is when we are children. When our dreams cannot be altered at corrupted by the world influences.

As I stepped out of the tent into the blasting heat, I looked back at the Alma and Arissa, and I felt God whisper questions.

What are we teaching our children? Do they know how to work? Are we depriving them opportunities to learn basic skills and develop a work ethic? Or even realize their talents and explore their gifts?

I was lucky. My parents “allowed” for me and siblings to spend Summers in Chicago around a card table and a scale, selling vegetables grown in our yard. Today, ironically, because of that road-side stand, my oldest brother Don is the CFO of an organic agriculture company. My brother Roger, was the best salesman hands down as he would rattle off tomato deals, “59 cents a pound or two pounds for a dollar.” Today he owns Blue Creek Produce, a produce distributor specializing in “garden to table food.” My sister Debbie was the most likeable little worker is the best accounts payable supervisor, and I loved to count the money in the green tin box at the end of day. Today, I manage my own wealth management practice. Summers spent working on our road side stand as kids  helped us realize our gifts.

Today, I saw the gift that the world has, in the potential of an ambitious girl named, Arissa. Don’t overlook your child’s gift and potential by not allowing them the opportunity to work. Can you be brave, like Alma, and listen to the Whispers Within?

” Teach a child to choose the right path & when he is older will remain upon it.” Proverbs 22:6