I know with all certainty, through my journey ,that we are all connected. God has put individuals along my path; however the reason I may not discover until years later.Sometimes it took a whole decade to discover why…
Rolling up my yoga mat and wiping the perspiration off my forehead… who am I kidding? More like toweling off after a long shower, with my body drenched in sweat, I step outside into a beautiful Chicago Spring day to feel the wind at my neck, cooling me off. Standing outside, enjoying the breeze is my yoga teacher. With gratitude I comment, ” Thanks, Corey. Great class!
Looking over he says, ” I notice something about you. You can do the poses but you don’t know how to practice yoga.”
Looking over at my teacher( who I admired , may I add), ” What do you mean? I don’t get it?”
” Yep. ” he quipped. “Like I said you don’t do know how to practice yoga. You don’t release. You practically hold your breath during the poses.”
I tried to offer an explanation, “I guess it’s the years of being a gymnast, I would hold my breathe before tumbling passes.”
” No, it is more than that. You need to learn to surrender, ” Corey said.
Feeling slightly offended, I tried to defend myself, “Hey, you don’t know me. I have been through a lot .” My frustration sparked my spontaneity to continue, “A divorce, my ex becoming a paraplegic, being a single mom for the last dozen years, running my own business. I am strong. I don’t need to surrender. I can do everything through Christ who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13″
Shaking his head slightly, the master yogi responded, ” Strength is in surrendering.”
Knowing I was not going to win this battle, I conceded. I nodded my head and said, ” Alright, see ya Corey.” and walked away.
Fast forward, to 2014, After a year of MRIs, Cat scans, blood tests, numerous doctors, no one could figure out why I was sick.Finally in 2015, I was diagnosed with Lyme disease It was humbling. I was no longer strong physically or mentally… and ” Sassy pants”, as some of my friends call me, did not exist. It was humbling but truthfully it was the best thing that could happened to me .
I finally learned to surrender. ” For when I am weak , then I am strong-the less I have, the more I depend on God.” 2 Corinthians 12:10
So today, in yoga class, as I am laying in savasana( translated :the dead mans pose for non yogis) I thought about Corey, my master yoga teacher, and silently I laughed . He was right ! There is strength in surrendering! As I lay on my mat I took a deep breath in and finally released a HUGE exhale. Thanks Corey!And as I looked at the ceiling… my eyes try to penetrate through to the sky to the heavens and thank the one who knows my heart and keeps me surrendering. Namaste.